I read an awesome article about Npredator (Narcissist-predator) in spiritual communities. I highly recommend that you read it. It is very interesting… because we all know one. 😉
I’ll highlight the one I find especially interesting.
A list of hallmarks of NPredator abuse
- Seeks power
- Seeks control
- Makes everything about themselves
- Larger than life and quite aware of it
- Spiritual experiences/circumstances are too good to be true
- They make up elaborate stories that often seem much like other community members’ stories
- Sudden expert status in a field/on an entity with no previous mention of it/them
- Claim accreditation and expert levels they don’t actually have
- Constantly asking for money or support, often in an entitled manner
- Will not accept/are snippy about critique of their work
- Copy and imitate the work of others with no credit
- Brag about their status/follower count/webpage hits, then claim to be humble
- Is a practiced liar and manipulator
- Once you no longer have something of value to them, they either don’t care about you or mark you as a threat
- Twisting words and gaslighting
- Dodging accountability, if apologies are issued they are nonpologies
- They use the language of the abused and pose as victims
- Openly speak of vendettas against specific people
- Act nice to a person in public, then completely smear their reputation in private
- They erase their history (difficult in a community of pseudonyms, but if they claim they’ve been in online communities since 2005 and you find all their blogs and comments from then are deleted, it’s a huge red flag)
- A history of frequent name and identity changes
- A lack of long-term friends from before they joined the community, or said friends are obvious victims or fellow NPs
- Over time, their stories, claimed spiritual experiences, and even life details just don’t add up
I especially love the point “Spiritual experiences/circumstances are too good to be true.” I love a good Unverified Personal Gnosis (UPG). For me it’s called DREAMING. Don’t get me wrong, dreaming is not random made up images, it is sacred. It makes the wielder of the UPG a crazy magical being. Most of the “spirit workers” I encounter are in fact DREAMERS.
But human “nature” (read programming) being what it is, we want to our personal experience to fit somewhere, somehow. We start to fill in the gaps. We cannot accept that our experience, as formidable as we experienced it, is in fact regular, normal, and as real as taking the bus or doing the groceries. People is making there sorry not about truth but about control. Because control confirms your power and your power confirms your existence.
The first mystery of existence lays in silence.
Pityful human, trying to dominate, to control, to kill. Then crying about the fact that you just wanted to connect, to be loved, to be heard. It makes me think about a quote I came across while tinkering with my understanding of the Emperor card in the Thoth Tarot.
“It is a vast lagoon of dream fragments of the male unconscious, haunted with eternal shadows that compete, strut, fight, kill and rape, and above all seek the approval of other men.” – Nikoletseas, The Iliad: The Male Totem